Do It! Marketing Blog: Marketing for Smart People™

Marriage, Sex and Marketing

marriage sex and marketing one night stand"Direct marketing is to social marketing what a one-night stand is to marriage." -- @dnewman

The above statement is a tweet that gets a lot of reaction - some positive, some negative, and some asking for more detail. So - you asked for it, you got it. Let's dig in...

Quick sidenote before we start: I find it telling that people read the analogy wrong - they sometimes misunderstand and think I'm saying that social marketing is the one-night stand. NOT AT ALL - direct marketing is the one-night stand. Social marketing is a marriage (unless you do it like an idiot - More on that later.

(Social marketing)

(Direct marketing)
 One-night stand: 

 Serious  Frivolous
 Committed  Promiscuous 
 Long-term  Short-term 
 Based on giving  Based on getting 
 Trust-based  Transaction-based 
 Other-focused  Self-focused 
 Metric: quality  Metric: quantity
 Heart, mind, body  Body  
 What's next?  Who's next? 
 Closer over time  Distance over time

The purpose of direct marketing (short for direct response marketing) is just that - to get a response. A hit. A lead. A sale. A little badda-bing in your pants, ya dig?

The purpose of social marketing (short for social media marketing) is to establish trust, build a strong relationship and deliver value over time. Can you hear the wedding bells?   

A big mistake that a lot of business owners, entrepreneurs and indepent professionals make is to think of social marketing in the same way that you might think of direct marketing or outbound sales activity. (As a marketing speaker and marketing coach, I see this mistake all the time and it's the source of MANY bad marketing decisions and idiotic online sales antics.)

Think about it: Cold calls. Email blasts. Direct mail like postcards and sales letters. Do those things and the natural question to ask is - OK, how much did you SELL TODAY?

You made 100 dials, you connected with 20 humans, you had 14 conversations, you qualified 5 serious prospects and then how much did you SELL TODAY?

You sent 10,000 postcards. Requests came back for 300 quotes. So how many widgets did you SELL TODAY?

All that scorekeeping, bad pick-up lines, hitting on people (not to mention the need to do it over and over again the next day, the next week, and the next month) is starting to sound a lot like Leisure Suit Larry's dating life, doesn't it?

Social marketing doesn't work that way. Social marketing is... well, social. It's about relationships and trust. Relationships and trust don't have an ON/OFF switch - they develop over time.

Transactions happen today from relationships you built last week, last month, and last year. The benefit of that - and the reason it's worth the "wait" is that social media gives you a permanent asset - TRUST.

Oh and by the way, married people DO have crazy good sex. But those transactions happen BECAUSE of the relationship, not instead of it!! It's the permanence of the relationship that gives you both the long-term love (trust) AND the short-term lust (profitable transactions) you want and need.  

Think about the long-term impact of your social media marketing assets and the fleeting nature of your direct marketing investments:

Blog entries are forever. They continue to sell your expertise, your company, and your value day after day, week after week, year after year.

LinkedIn recommendations are forever. People that wrote glowingly of you in 2002 are still "selling" for you and your reputation TODAY.

A voice mail? BEEP - gone.

An email? ZAP - deleted.

A sales letter or postcard? THUNK - into the recycling.

Those happen today and they're gone today. 

Sure, you have to sell today. You have to make your quota today. You have to feed your family today. But social media marketing helps you ensure that what you create ONCE today works and lasts and brings customers and clients to you for many years to come...

Not because you SOLD them like an idiot -- but because you built the trust and relationships that HELPED THEM BUY today, tomorrow and beyond!

Use the COMMENTS area below to share your advice, insights and recommendations on marriage, sex or marketing. 
marriage sex and marketing

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